October 27, 2011

As for another step

Last night I turned in my first college application. I have applied to college.
I, Jess, 17 year old high school senior, have applied to college.
I am in my last year of high school.
I have seven months left living at home.
I love my friends.
I actually feel like myself.
I've come so far in the past two, four, six, years.
I've been looking forward to this since I learned what "college" meant.
I've strayed.
I've thought twice.

Four years ago I saw myself as I completely different person - and I never saw that changing. I still felt lost in the sauce and overwhelmingly self conscious. I didn't always want to be known as "the smart one."
The people I wanted to be friends with four years ago I would never want to be friends with now. Four years ago I didn't want to be who I was. Now I can't imagine going back to that place. It's eery to think my time here is almost over. I've been so focused on looking forward, especially with applications, that it keeps on striking me how close we really are to the end (or the beginning, whatever). This is it.

In other news, good happy music (aka what I listened to all day in celebration of first submission): Anything by The Guggenheim Grotto. I first saw them open for Ingrid Michaelson two years ago and they were not only adorable, but very good too. Two acoustic-instrument playing young Irish men - what more could you ask for? My personal favorite album of theirs is "Happy the Man" and my favorite songs are "Her Beautiful Ideas" and "Sunshine Makes Me High." Go listen! Actually....listen right here!

Her Beautiful Ideas - The Guggenheim Grotto

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